Learning Life Lessons from Lesbians

I thought it might be nice to start out by taking the advice of the 5th ingredient in Shernell's recipe: Never be afraid to share of yourself.


Last week was "pride week" in Boston, and my good friend invited me to go to a pride event with her at a club on Saturday night. I'm not much of a "club" person, but I figured it could be fun. I like new experiences and meeting new and different people. She also mentioned that it was mainly a lesbian event, but I didn't think much of it...until Saturday afternoon. She had sent me a link about the event that I had previously forgotten about, but because I was feeling a bit nervous, I went through my facebook messages and opened it up. The event was called "Dyke Night" and the webpage had tons of pictures - about 99% of them with only females.

I freaked out.

I told my friend I couldn't go with her and imagined myself as a creepy straight dude sitting in a corner, trespassing in a place where I didn't belong. I would be awkward, not have any fun, and would even waste $15 on the cover. On top of that, people would probably think I was there because of some screwed up lesbian fetish. They wouldn't want me there, and wouldn't want to be there - this would be zero fun for all parties involved.

My friend was disappointed, but said she understood. She has only been "out" for a few years and doesn't have that many glbt friends. She explained to me that she was attempting to learn about the culture and meet some people who could better relate to issues that she has had to deal with. She is the only lesbian in our friend group, and at times, she is the odd one out. Then it hit me: the fear I felt about going to the club must be similar to what she has to endure on a regular basis. The way I would feel isolated at the club is the way she feels a lot of the time. I felt really dumb for not recognizing this right away. "Fuck it" I said. "Lets do this."

Overall, the club was a blast. Although I got a bunch of strange looks and glances, we ended up having lots of fun and met a bunch of cool people. My friend and I even got cheered for when when we poll danced and did a striptease on stage. The end.


So, if you couldn't figure them out already, here are the 2 morals of my post:

1. Don't be afraid to try new things. Duh, this one should be obvious. Trying new things can lead you to new and awesome experiences that can probably make you more relatable person down the road.

2. Put yourself in someone elses shoes. This is very important for being a good HF/CA/RA. Think of what it's like to be a resident, an RA, a CA (if you are a HF), and even a HF (if you are a CA). Perspective is key to any good relationship.


~Chris